Hypotheticals of a Windowsill

Send a prayer and talk to the stars for you. That’s a lively combination. We could both live in the sky. If we believe our dreams can come true.

What do people believe in anymore?

How does this world test your faith?

Can you smell the rain?

Can you see the difference in the snow?

Can you have an appetite for thunder?

Can you feel the Sun?

Can you hear the wind?

That’s not how it works around here. There’s nothing but darks skies and city lights. You have to outrun air pollution if you want breathe in paradise.

And I’ve done everything in this life but give up and sometimes that seems like the best option.

I just wanted to write something beautiful about how we sit at windowsills watching the weather change and not knowing how to feel.

I wanted to let you know everyone is waiting on something. Just because your wait is a little longer that doesn’t mean that you will amount to nothing.

Your time will come and clocks do change.

You can let your fears go and embrace the doubt.

Burning bridges just hoping the fire lights my way. If not; I’ll save the secondhand smoke and hopefully get high another day.

If walking this path isn’t meant for me I’ll find another way. All of the Earth is my temple.

My version of god is the universe and a well executed plan. I got enough friends. I want to know who is going to be my enemy in the end.

Roses from the concrete the block is fertilizer in these ghetto streets.

A breakout urban masterpiece.

We was in these streets with all this protection but no one to protect. Because we didn’t care how we went as long as we weren’t caged. Animals that need to be free. Christmas gifts came in the form of death threats. They tried to teach me how to stick razor blades under my tongue. You never want to put your hand too close to a lost boy willing to do anything to eat.

The hypothetical of if I did sell.

The left hand was were I kept tomorrow’s debt. The right hand is where I held tonight’s ambition.

We would talk about there being more. We just didn’t have the vision.

I won’t say names we hold true to those traditions.

The hypothetical of if that gun was held to my head.

If I were to go I knew I’d die bleeding I promised myself I never die breathing. All I thought about was my mother’s tears. You die everyday when you live like a coward. I put these walls up high because I liked the view from the tower. I sit and talk to the moon by myself I believe in a higher power.

I sat in the back of cop cars as if I was looking out of windowsills.

Talking to angels with emotions that I met in the trench.

I’m speaking perfect English when I said I want to kiss you in French. I’m feeling like a refugee because your border is closed.

I try to hold on to the warmth that keeps me human because I’ve seen myself really cold. I said it before but nobody really understands what I would do to my foes. I thank Mrs. D as much as possible I tell her all of my goals.

I don’t take death lightly cause I carried caskets that were heavy. I just realize when it comes to being human; you come and go.

You are dirt, seed, tree and then you are dirt again in the physical sense. I don’t have answers for the spiritual sense.

Evil and young so religion always come with question marks. I question everything even when it hits the mark.

Embracing elements of the dark. We were on them corners serving late night like some vampires. My conspiracy theory was to conspire that they want me here. Thinking white powder castles would lead us to empires. They left castles and then screamed white power after we helped them build their empires. If you ever looked me in my eyes you can tell I’m not a liar. If you ever read my words you can see why I’m the lion. My mom use to call J-Bird and back then we wasn’t flying. I had to embrace everything I wanted to escape.

I had to let go of my mistakes…

I had to embrace everything I wanted to escape, but there’s still times these vicious memories keep a hold on me.

My demons are a weighted blanket. Welcome to gravity.

Hypothetically if I did lose you.

It would mean at that time I wasn’t meant to have you. That I needed to do better and be better. That these lessons I needed to learn alone. And once I did learn them by then you would be long gone. We can talk about timing, but I rather discuss the growth as seasons change. Clocks will tick, they will never be the same. My good quality is I blame myself for my own mistakes. I never throw rocks then hide my hand and look the other way.

Sometimes I’m David. Sometimes I’m Goliath. I’m always up for the fight either way.

And I don’t know what you need from me. Because I could ask you a million times and you wouldn’t feel

It’s safe to tell me.

I want all the knowledge you would give your lover and your best friend.

Knocking at your locked door. Will you let me in?

The one time you answer all my questions just know that I’m going to listen.

I want to hear you articulate love letters out loud; that’s a real voicemail.

I’m a risk taker I’ve always been one to ask for forgiveness, unless it is a woman’s body in that case I always ask for permission.

I want to make your life feel like a field trip. I mean an acid trip. I mean uhhh…I’m tripping over my words. I want to sip from your cup till it runneth over and I can permanently taste your essence on my lips. The nectar from the core of your hips make the tongue of men trying to communicate do back flips.

You’ve been grounded for too long.

I think we should kick it.

I’ve been faded too long.

These are my sober thoughts.

You’ve been jaded too long.

Let’s take a long walk.

I want to be a part of your journey.

Together we can figure out are you broken like me or am I broken like you.

Maybe it’s all one in the same

Incase no one has ever told you this; listen closely.

No one has it figured out. We are all learning to dress the part. We have to experience life in order to know what holds us together and what makes us fall apart. Sometimes we have to fall apart over and over again until we find some form of simple happiness.

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our days we forget about the universe.

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the universe we forget about our days.

I’m not here to tell you what’s right or wrong. I’m just making an observation on my own behalf.

Hypothetically speaking…none of this real.

Still we treat it like it’s everything we know, simply because we don’t know anything else.

I just wanted to write something beautiful.

Sitting at windowsills watching the weather change and not knowing how to feel.

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